A Road Map to Your Goals
Read about me in the Huffington Post.
I was driving my car and listening to one of my many mentors through my Bluetooth and when he was speaking, I had an epiphany. It may seem that as a life coach I may have everything figured out, but even we — yes, the experts that learn the tools and research behind how to create balance and meaning in daily live — we, too keep seeking for new ways of thinking and living.
I had been a life coach for 17 years and when asked by both individuals and companies about myself, my logical brain goes to the place which I call “credential security”: my college degree, many of the certification and training programs I’ve taken, my field experience and the many reputable companies and individuals that I have been fortunate enough to work with over the years. I have all of that data in a file ready to email to any person that wants to know. But I realized this did not explain the urgency driving my life purpose, my natural instinct to help others achieve life balance and joy through tried and true mindful practices.
Here is where my epiphany came in . . . When I listen to my mentors, each of them has a real, raw story that defines them and that is what has fueled their passion and commitment to the field they are in. I too, have a story that gives me the passion and drive to help others live life to their full potential — whether they are in a career transition, experiencing change or dissatisfaction, or want to simply get organized about their life. My story is one that I have understood very clearly for my entire life, but sharing it, has not been something I would readily do.
I am now at the point where I think I have done myself and my clients a disservice by not sharing the story that has been the very thing that brought me to my passion. It is the partnership each life coach has with people who are looking for their reason, passion and goals for their own lives.
So, from this point on, when people ask me what is “my story,” this is what I will say.
I had a very traumatic entry into this word. I was born into a circumstance that is unusual and hard to hear for most people. I am the youngest of three children. Six months before I was born, my biological father went missing. Yes, missing, as in, he didn’t come home from work that day. He continued to be missing until two weeks before I was born. So, even as an unborn child, my mom was carrying a baby with a major mental burden of taking care of two other kids while being pregnant and the emotional agony of not knowing where her husband was. This time must have been extremely difficult and very taxing both physically and emotionally. Two weeks before I was born my biological father was found and he had been brutally murdered. Are you uncomfortable yet?
That was my start to coming into this world so as you can see that when a child is born, their welcome may be very different than mine. My start was rough. For the next few years of my life my mom was trying to deal with the death of her husband, being a widow and raising three children. You can imagine the priority that I felt as my place in this family. My mom would say that I was the very thing that kept her on her feet and getting out of bed each day because I was a baby who needed her. She actually thanks me for being responsible for her not going into the depths of depression. With that, my life would never be the same. Most other kids growing up have the typical challenges that come with being a child, a toddler, a teenager and young adult. I feel like my trauma and ability to survive and succeed in life is very much due to the fact that I had to grow up very fast and live an “adult” life at such a young age.
I learned very quickly that doing it MYSELF and doing it with a PLAN was the only option that would help me feel safe and in control. I took on the roles to be like a mom, dad, teacher, housekeeper, among many other things. But acting like a child or having a “fun, carefree childhood”…. I did not. Essentially, I became my own life coach in kindergarten, and I became really good at it. I learned how to bring organization to chaos, to find a way to make things work, and as I grew older, how to bring back balance and joy to this very organized way of life.
So, when people, be it friends or family or later on, clients would ask me why I seem to “have it all together,” it was not by choice, it was just my way of surviving my childhood. By the time I was an adult, it came very naturally to me. Make a GOAL make a PLAN , DO IT , and if it doesn’t work, make another plan and keep going until you get your needs met as well as your goals accomplished. Behave as if this is your only choice, and not doing it is not an option. I understand this urgency deeply, and can teach it to others — whether it be a corporate client looking for advice and guidance, or a client looking for their life purpose, greater balance and overall joy.
That is how I was led into this field. In my opinion, my major in Communication, minor in sociology and my Life Coach certification course pales in comparison to the 46 years of living a goal driven life.
I would like to help you do the same.